i gained so much weight this year, i put on my string bikini underwear and couldnt see the string anymore! i hate my life.
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize
