Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
At least the cops kept you away from sleeping with her. Protect and Serve.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
