Three words: puerto rican gang bang
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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