Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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