Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
I had to explain to an ER nurse that I burned my dick playing onion ring toss today, your social awkwardness hardly compares.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
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