i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
