:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
