she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
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