In all seriousness though I just found out the dog pissed in my bed it'd be nice to crash somewhere other than my couch while my piss soaked bedding is in the washer
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
today i did the best job ever shaving. like my vagina is PERFECT. plus i straightened my hair for a good hour. if i don't get ass tonight, i'm killing a baby.
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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