I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Randomize
