I must be too annoying 4 u.
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
