I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
nope. just stoned. wishing i had a golf cart.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
