I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
I'm really busy with my period
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