He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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