I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
