So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
I want my tombstone to read "making poor life decisions since 1993"
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
