I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
