there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
