That cute girl I hooked up with last night clawed my back to hell and gave me a hickey. I look like a white trash warewolf victim
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
He ain't mine yet. Gotta have a third date before I pee on him and mark territory.
Oh. Wait. That happened on the second date.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Randomize
