guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
my dog ran away and came back with a marajuana plant. what are you doing tonight?
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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