You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
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