I wannas sexs uuuuu
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
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