i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I enjoy the company of your penis
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
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