hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Fuck 8am classes
Dear Jesus I'm gonna throw up through my eyes
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
Randomize