The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
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