normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
I asked for my Beats earbuds back and he sent me a pic of them tied around his penis. Now I miss both my great ear buds and his great dick
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
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