Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize
