Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
