Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize
