wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I folded my dollar bills into mustaches in preparation for our trip to the strip club
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
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