I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
