After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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