what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
why do cheetos always look like penises
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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