She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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