his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
I hope your face alive. Lemme know if you are breathing in the morning. If not. Whoever is reading this tell me when the funeral for this awesome mother fucker is and we will rage at that event. Kthanksbye
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Just saw 4 of my students at Denny's at 4am on a Tuesday. We all pretended not to see each other, as we are all clearly tipsy and/or stoned. Class is in less than 4 hours. Either i'm getting too old for this shit or they're starting on the road to crazy-town much earlier these days.
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