I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
Don't drink and shop. I went for happy hour and came home with a fog machine. I now have no other choice but to scare the shit out of my neighbors with it.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
