i just ordered an al pacino with double mocha at starbucks.. i'm waiting to see how long it takes the chick to realize what i said.
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
We don't watch enough power rangers
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
I dont even know what happened i just remember waking up with beer cans outlining my body...
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