There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
He muttered something about having just washed he sheets, then demanded I give him all my quarters.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
Just farted cum and thought I shit myself. Crisis averted tho
If I don't wake up hungover in a ditch Monday morning I will consider my halloween a failure
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
