remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Randomize
