hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
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