Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize
