I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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