Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Randomize
