so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
We took shots in honor of Shark Week.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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