Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
After sending me a dick pic, he asked, "yay or nay?"
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
