that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
