Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
