Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
Randomize