remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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