jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
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